Burt: These your roommates?

Sophia: Yeah

Burt: Which one’s the slut?

Blanche, Dorothy, Rose: I am!

Blanche: We’re gonna see Burt after all!

Sophia: Which one of you isn’t going?

Blanche: Well… I’m the one who won the tickets.

Dorothy: It’s my mom who’s bailing us out.

Rose: I lost Butter Queen. Haven’t I suffered enough?

Rose: Sophia, did you come to bail us out?

Dorothy: No, Rose, she’s dropping off a manicotti with a file in it.

Rose: [on being Butter Queen] From the time I was born my folks groomed me for it.

Rose: Singing lessons, dancing lessons, junior butter pageants.

Rose: For 16 years my entire life revolved around butter.

Dorothy: You were very fortunate. So many of us wasted our youth.

Dorothy: So what was this great disappointment in your life?

Rose: Butter. I wanted to be Butter Queen.

Blanche: Aw, yeah. What an actress.

Blanche: She was so good in Gone With the Wind.

Blanche: I wanted to be Miss Olivia de Havilland myself.

Dorothy: Blanche, are you even listening?

Blanche: Bits and pieces.

Rose: Well, Butter Queen was our town’s highest honor.

Dorothy: You’re not going to tell us that story about the exploding pig again, are you?

Rose: I never told you a story about an exploding pig, Dorothy.

Rose: It was a peg-legged pig.

Rose: Our possum was the one that exploded.

Dorothy: Forgive me, Rose. With so many possum explosions, it’s hard to keep track.

[everybody chanting] Fight, fight, fight, fight, fight!

Dorothy: Listen… you punk!

Dorothy: You wanna fight, you’ll have to fight me.

Dorothy: But I warn you, I did time in Attica.

Prostitute: Attica’s a men’s prison.

Dorothy: I know. I was there a year before they found out.

Rose: I was booked. Fingerprints, mug shots.

Rose: I’m a known criminal. I can’t go back to my home town.

Blanche: Nobody’s ever gonna find out.

Rose: Oh yes, they will.

Rose: The St. Olaf Courier Dispatch is known for its investigative reporting.

Dorothy: You’re right. That series they did on oat fungus…

Dorothy: …was an uncompromising piece of journalism.

Rose: Then one day they’ll find me, holed up in a shack in the Louisiana bayou.

Rose: A sheriff named Bull will call my name over a megaphone.

Rose: When I run, he’ll riddle my body with bullets.

Rose: I wanna live! I wanna live!

Dorothy: You’re not good in a crisis, are you Rose?

Policeman: The wagons will be here momentarily to transport you all downtown.

Rose: Downtown? He means jail!

Dorothy: Oh, really Rose. I thought he meant Neiman Marcus.