Rose: Alright, everybody, now shut the hell up! I’m in charge. From now on, everybody listens to me.
Dudebro: Why should we listen to you?
Rose: I am the most decorated pioneer scout in the history of northern Minnosota. I can build a 100 foot rope bridge, start a fire with rocks, distil sea water into drinking water. If you want to get out of this alive, listen to me. Any objections?
Rose: I didn’t think so.
Dudebro: It was our superior sailing skill that saved your lives.
Dorothy: Hanging onto the mast screaming, “Please, God, take the old ladies, but don’t hurt us.” That does not qualify as skill.
Blanche: You almost killed us, you nitwits! I hate you! I curse the day I ever laid eyes on you. I curse the day your momma laid eyes on your daddy, and the day he laid down with her.
Dudebro: So, how have you ladies been enjoying your vacation?
Dorothy: As a child during the Depression, I had to have my wisdom teeth extracted by a shoemaker. That was more fun than this.
Dudebro: Ladies, I hate to disturb you, but we would like to buy you a drink.
Blanche: Why, thank you!
Blanche: I’m sorry. It was a reflex reaction. No, thank you and goodbye.
Blanche: That meal was disgusting.
Rose: What do you girls want to do now?
Dorothy: Let’s draw cards for the rest of the Pepto-Bismol.
Dorothy: Blanche, what is all that stuff?
Blanche: Just my natural beauty supplements. This is my apricot facial scrub and my honey skin toner.
Dorothy: If I put cracked ice and an umbrella on your head, you’d be a mai tai.
Dorothy: In here it says that every room has an ocean view. Now where is ours?
Hotel Manager: Give me it. Come here, kiddo. Here, over here. Stick your head out of the window. Look to the extreme left and what do you see?
Rose: Two guys beating up an old lady.
Hotel Manager: Beyond that.
Rose: The ocean.
Hotel Manager: Ta da! I rest my case.